I'm the type that hates feeling low and down. Granted, not a LOT of people enjoy that feeling, but some live in it. So when I feel in the dumps like I have been lately, I put all my energy into forcing myself out of it. And so far, I have mostly succeeded. The power of the mind is an amazing thing- and stronger than we give our minds credit for.
In my last post I talked about how I need to get out and be social instead of isolating myself. That's what everyone says to do. But I realize that when I isolate myself, I can work through things a lot quicker than if I'm putting on a fake happy face for others. Spending time alone helps me focus on what's important.
So here I am today, feeling quite a bit better about things. And the number one reason that I am choosing to not be defeated is this: My life is my own. I make my own choices. I can choose to wallow in depression and self-pity, or I can choose to give myself more credit and smile a heart-felt smile.
As much as I have felt stuck and trapped in routines and ruts, I only have myself to blame. My friend Troy has been known to say something along the lines of "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results", or something like that. And I fully believe that this is true. Now I'm not saying that I'm going to do anything extreme and pack up and move to Africa or anything (where did that come from???). I'm just saying that it's my choice to stay stuck in the rut, consider it a rut in the first place, or take action. Even if that action is stepping outside myself for a moment and taking stock.
Whatever I do or don't do with my life, it's MINE. And I have no desire to live it in darkness.
Now that that's over, just one quick little thing I would like to discuss:
There are two women's bathrooms in my office since we have very few men. They turned the men's room into a second women's room and made a closet the men's room. (Yah, wierd.) My bathroom of choice is the less busy one for obvious reasons. Yesterday I walked in right at the same time as a coworker. At that point, it's just rude to walk out and go into the other bathroom. So this coworker proceeds to talk to me while we enter our respective stalls, and continues talking to me while draining our bladders. Then, she let a little something slip. Yep, she farted right smack dab in the middle of our one-sided conversation (as I don't conversate while using the facilities). She said "Oops, sorry" and then went right back to talking. I'm not embarassed of bodily functions, I don't get sickened by normal things that our crazy bodies do, I usually end up in some really inappropriate conversations with friends. But THAT? Um...... awkward.